self esteem

Get Rich by Reading Articles on Self Esteem

2009-03-14T08:37:00.001-07:00

That is not just a catchy title; you really can improve your financial situation by improving your self-image. By following the expert advice found in numerous articles on self esteem, you can enjoy not only wealth, but also health and happiness.

The Money-Me Connection

Money is an important subject for a lot of people nowadays. Being unsuccessful and having low self esteem are the compass points of a never ending downhill spiral that just keeps feeding on itself. You feel bad because you do not have enough money. Your poor self confidence lowers your chances of success. Do not let your current status affect your outlook.

Ask any successful person and they will all give you the same answer. If you do not believe that you will succeed, then you never will. You may think, “That is easy for them to say, they have already made it!” But all you need to do is look into the past of these success stories. Where they were in the beginning is not so different from where you are now. They did not start successful, but they believed that they would succeed. Confidence is a skill that anyone can acquire.

Not-so-Fringe Benefits

The benefits of improved self-esteem are not only evidenced in your work life but also in your personal life and health. A positive outlook lowers heart rate and blood pressure, and improves the efficiency of energy production. It is associated with decreased incidence of headaches, muscle pains, and digestive problems. Not only will you be wealthy, but healthy as well.

Another great advantage to having improved confidence is seeing the positive way that people around you will respond to the change. People are more willing to help complete strangers if they exude confidence and goodwill. Co-workers and superiors at work will be less likely to throw obstacles in your way, and will be more lenient if you make small mistakes.

Your loved ones will stay with you through good and bad times, but they deserve the best. Improving your self-image only validates your relationship. Who wants to be with someone who does not think they are worth loving or taking care of? Knowing you are an important and successful person makes them worthy as well.

Getting Your Feet on the Right Track

You may be at a point in your life where you feel beaten down and used up. You may feel like you have exhausted all your options, but that is never the case. There is always a way out of any hole, no matter how deep. The first step you need to take is to hope. Know that you can change your circumstances by changing the way you think about them.

The next step is gathering the tools you will need to change the way you think. Your poor self esteem was not built in a day, and it will not be unbuilt in a day. It has been built over years of disappointment and failure. It has been reinforced by poor habits and negative worldviews. It will take time and consistent effort to reverse these changes.

You can get help from many experts who have proven techniques. Look for articles on self esteem. They can be found online, in magazines, in books. Take charge of changing yourself for the better, and let richness into your life.

Set by : Healthy Lifestyle

10 Ways to Improving Low Self Esteem

2009-03-14T08:22:00.000-07:00

Everyone strives to find ways to improve their self esteem. Whether you’re doing this subconsciously or physically it doesn’t really matter. But this creates a challenge especially since you’re not particular on what you would like to improve on. Chances are you’re improving low self esteem without even thinking about it.

Not many are familiar with the ways of improving their self esteem and here are ten helpful guides you can easily follow.

• Stock up on your self esteem by creating a check list of things you want to improve on. Start by how you communicate with others. Accomplish one change at a time and put check on it once you’re done and move on to what’s next on the list.

• Feel good about yourself starting now and show that extra confidence to everyone wherever and whenever you find yourself in. Remember it’s the journey that matters most than the destination.

• Create a goal for yourself by knowing what you want. Find out how the people around you or the ones you meet can help you get closer to your goals. This will help you determine how you can approach each person. Do this always and the results are noticeable.

• Get driven and motivate yourself. Let everyone know how any of them can help you in your goals. People who are very driven end up being successful in their careers.

• Develop the mindset that every person you meet is important. It’s surprising how effective this is.

• Two things: give a good handshake and look a person in the eye when speaking to them. Make sure your handshake is firm and not too hard. Always try to look for a good character trait you find attractive in every person you meet.

• Learn to listen. Give notice to what others are saying. Try to remember a person’s name and if you forget ask their name after exchanging a couple of sentences.

• Show a person that you are responding to them by nodding or calling out their name. Make use of your listening abilities. Remember, people can read through your body language.

• Remind yourself that everything is not all about you by paying attention to others around you. Learn to accept news whether it is good or bad. Empathize with other people’s situation and genuinely show that you care.

• Do not interrupt a person while speaking whether you’re doing this mentally or verbally. In short, give a person your full attention when they are speaking because its’ rude if you don’t.

Now that you know how to improve yourself esteem, try to apply this in your everyday interactions with others. The more of these tips you apply everyday the brighter your aura gets and you charisma gets a good boost. But if you want have a more charismatic personality it’s going to take more than these ten tips to achieve that.

Having a very positive aura definitely helps in improving low self esteem. Not only does this benefit you but it also benefits everyone and everything around you. Your positivity affects your interactions with your family, your outlook on your career and it can make people of the opposite sex find you more attractive and likable.

Sent by : Healthy Lifestyle

What is self esteem?

2008-07-24T02:26:00.000-07:00

Your self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal “ups and downs” of everyday life. If someone has healthy self esteem normal “ups and downs” may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves but only to a limited extent. For someone who has poor self-esteem these “ups and downs” can make all the difference in the world.

Most people’s thoughts about themselves fluctuate daily based on their everyday experiences. How your friends treat you, how well you have done at something, changes in your romantic relationship can all have a temporary impact on your well-being.

Where does our self esteem come from?

Self-esteem is largely developed during our childhood. It evolves throughout our lives as we build an image of ourselves through our experiences with different people and activities. When we are growing up, our successes and failures and how we are treated by our immediate family, teachers and our peers all contribute to the creation of our self-esteem.
For example experiences in childhood that lead to healthy self-esteem include:

• Being praised
• Being listened to
• Being spoken to with respect
• Having trustworthy friends
• Experiencing success in school

Experiences that lead to low self-esteem include:

• Being badly criticized
• Being shouted at
• Being ridiculed, teased or ignored
• Experiencing failure in school
• Being expected to be “perfect” all the time

What does your “inner voice” say?

Everything we have experienced in the past is still alive inside us in the form of an “inner voice”. We don’t often “hear” this voice in the same way we would a spoken one but it acts in a similar way, constantly repeating those original messages to us.

For people with healthy self-esteem our inner voice reassures us and sends positive messages. For people with low self-esteem the inner voice becomes a harsh critic constantly criticizing and belittling their accomplishments.

The three “characters” of low self-esteem

Most of us have an image of what someone with low self-esteem looks like but it is not always obvious. Below are 3 examples of types of people who suffer from low self-esteem:

1. The Impostor – this person always acts happy and successful but is actually terrified of failing. They need continuous success to maintain their mask of positive self-esteem and this can lead to problems with perfectionism, procrastination, competition and ultimately burn-out.

2. The Rebel – this person acts as if the opinions of others – especially important or powerful people – don’t matter. They always need to prove that other’s criticisms or judgements don’t hurt and they carry around a lot of anger about not feeling “good enough”. This can lead to problems like blaming others all the time, breaking the law or rules or fighting against authority.

3. The Loser – this person is unable to cope with the world and they wait for someone to come to the rescue. They tend to use self-pity or indifference as a shield against fear of taking responsibility for changing their life. This can lead to problems such as under-achievement, excessive reliance on others in relationships or lacking any assertiveness skills.

Consequences of low self-esteem

• It can create anxiety, stress, loneliness and increased chances of developing depression
• It can cause problems with relationships and friendships
• It can seriously impair job and academic performance
• It can lead to underachievement and an increased vulnerability to alcohol or drug abuse

How to improve your self-esteem

Before you can even attempt to improve your self-esteem you must first believe that you can change it and also you must need to want to change it. Change doesn’t happen overnight and is not always easy but it can happen! Once you have accepted that you have the power to do something there are 3 steps you can take to begin to change your self-esteem.

1. Challenge the inner critic - here are typical examples of the inner critic’s voice and how you can challenge what it is saying:

Inner critic: Unfairly harsh – “People said they liked what I did but it was nowhere as good as it should have been. I can’t believe no-one noticed all the mistakes I made” Challenge: Be reassuring – “They really liked it. Maybe it wasn’t perfect but I did a good job. I am proud of myself. This was a success”

Generalising unrealistically – “I got a really low mark in this test. I am such an idiot, I don't understand anything. I shouldn’t be doing this course” Be specific – “I didn’t do as well on this test but I have done ok on the others. There are some things I don’t understand yet but I have done well in other classes that were just as tough as this”

Makes leaps of illogic – “He is frowning at me. He hasn’t said anything but I know it means he doesn’t like me” Think it through logically – “Ok, he’s frowning but it may have nothing to do with me, he could have something worrying him – maybe I should ask him?”

Turning everything into a catastrophe – “She turned me down for a date. I’ll never find a partner. I’ll always be alone” Be objective – “That was a bit embarrassing. Still, I know I’m a nice and attractive person. I’ll find someone else”

It sounds so simple doesn’t it? But you would be surprised at how many people find it difficult to challenge their inner critic! With practice it can be done….

2. Look after and value yourself – you are a deserving and competent person who deserves the best out of life. If you introduce the following tips into your life you will feel a lot better about yourself:

• Get enough sleep, eat healthily, take regular exercise, practice good hygiene
• Go to the cinema, take a nap, have a massage, adopt a pet, spend some time in the garden – DO WHAT YOU ENJOY
• Spend time with positive friends, compliment yourself for achieving something, buy yourself something
• Remind yourself of your strengths/achievements, keep a list of all the things you like about yourself, keep mementos of things you have achieved where you can see them, keep a “success” file of any certificates/awards etc you have and refer to it on a regular basis
• If you make a mistake, just forgive yourself and move on. None of us are perfect!
• “Fake it” until you can “make it” – when you continue to treat yourself well you will feel better about yourself even if initially you don’t believe you deserve it.

3. Get help from others - this is not always easy for people with low self-esteem as they feel they don’t deserve help. However, since low self-esteem is often caused by how others have treated you in the past, you may need the help of others in the present to challenge negative past experiences.

• Ask for support from friends – ask them to tell you what they like about you or what they think you do well
• Ask someone to just listen whilst you “vent” your feelings for a while without trying to “fix” things
• Ask for a hug
• Ask someone who loves you to remind you that they do and why

Sometimes low self-esteem can feel so painful or difficult to overcome that the help of a therapist or counsellor is needed.

Tip from Counselling Spain: One of the advantages of talking to a therapist or counsellor is that you can say anything in a confidential environment without being judged or having your feelings dismissed as “silly”.

Seny by : Healthy Lifestyle

Developing Self Esteem During Childhood

2008-04-26T20:16:00.001-07:00

How important is self-esteem in a child's development? Developing self-esteem during childhood is very crucial. This is because it could affect the child in every stages of his or her development. How he looks at him or herself will definitely affect his or her future relationships, career development, confidence, prosperity and even happiness. Studies have shown that one of the traits happy people share is having a positive self-image of themselves.

The building of self-esteem starts in childhood. This means that as parents you have a responsibility to help your son or daughter to have a healthy self-image of him or herself. A healthy self-image is the cornerstone of good self-esteem.

How does a parent that his or her child has a healthy self-image? There are several ways to do this. Below are just some of the things you can do to develop your child's self-esteem.

Never compare your child with other children

The single most devastating thing a parent can do to ruin his or her child's self-esteem is to compare him or her with other children. Unfortunately, comparisons are very much a part of our culture particularly our schooling system. One of the ways a child gets compared to other children is through peer pressure.

Every child knows that there is tremendous pressure from other children, particularly from the ones in school to conform to the ways of a certain group. That is why in school you can see several cliques and these groups can be identified with different labels. There are the jocks, the jerks, the nerd or geek, the addict, the slut, etc. These groups are inherently not bad but oftentimes group's identity precedes the individual's identity which could lead into a loss in identity and eventually low self-esteem.

To most adults these are just groups and labels but for a young innocent child the cliques are their world. Your child intentionally or not gets labeled and his or her tendency to is group with the ones with similar ideas and interests.

Always praise and encourage your children

When you talk to your child, always remember to use positive and encouraging words. If your child has done something praiseworthy then do not hold back on the kind and beautiful words. Doing so will do wonders for your kid's self esteem. It does not matter whether the act is big or small. If he did something good then praise him for it. There is nothing more discouraging than the feeling of not being appreciated for the things that you have done.

Praising and encouraging children provides them with a positive self image of themselves. For them, it means that they are important enough for you to notice and recognize their achievements in life.

By constantly giving kind encouraging words to children, you can ensure that they will grow healthy psychologically.

Of course if they did something wrong, children should be reprimanded. But should do it in a way that it won't hurt their ego and damage their esteem. Whenever they have done something that is less than d desirable always make it clear to them that you are not in favor with the deed and not with them.

Remember, developing your child's self-esteem is very important in his or her progress. Just follow the guidelines to make sure that your kid will grow up mature emotionally and mentally.

Sent by : Healthy Lifestyle

Activities in building self-esteem in children

2008-04-26T20:15:00.000-07:00

One of the main issues that parents must deal with when raising a kid is their self-concept and self-esteem. Teaching our kids to value themselves and their talents can be a tricky thing to do as parents must be able to achieve a balance between allowing their kids enough independence to be able to decide for themselves and act on their own and the guidance that will keep them in the right path.

Being too lax and giving them too much freedom can lead to rebellion while being too strict can destroy a child’s independent spirit and foster too much dependence.

Although self-esteem can be developed anytime in a person’s life, it is good to start early and train your child to trust in what they can do and to embrace their individual talents. Below are some activities that you can do with your child that can help them increase their levels of self-esteem.

Self-affirming statements

Talking to yourself in front of the mirror and telling yourself what a great person you are can be a bit childish for a grown-up to do but not for a child. And even if it seems childish, the practice is quite effective in boosting our self-esteem. And you don’t even have to stick to the mirror process. You can create your own as long as you stick to the basic, which is the saying of self-affirming statements.

Create a mantra that your child can easily remember. Every morning, tell your child the mantra and have your child tell hers to you. The statements need not even be something about the self but about each other such as saying I love you in the morning or telling each other how great the other is.
There is really no exact way to do this. You can create your own variations as long as the essence of affirming oneself is there.

The positive trait game

Another activity that you can do with your child that will not only boost her self-esteem but also help in building his or her vocabulary is the positive trait game. In this game, you wll each tell each other the positive traits that one sees in the other. The catch is that the trait should start in a specific letter of the alphabet.

The positive trait game is a wonderful way to teach your kid to think positive thoughts and to acknowledge the traits and talents that make him or her unique. This is also a great way to make sure that he or she will grow up knowing where his or her strengths lie.

Do activities that they love

Encourage them to try out new things so that they will discover their talents and abilities. Enroll them in different summer classes and be open to all kinds of things. For instance, if he is good with drawing and crayons, it does not mean that he will not be good in music. So don’t discount music lessons as part of his summer curriculum.

Anyhow, if he does not like it, at least he has learned something new. Helping them discover the things that they love to do and the things that they are good at is a great way to boost their self esteem early on. After all, when children are enjoying what they are doing, they become very enthusiastic and they are open to developing their skills further.

Parents Should Be Able to Build Self Esteem In A Child

2008-04-17T20:13:00.000-07:00

Being able to have children is a gift. Simply feeding and clothing is not enough because these are just some of the things that parents will be doing to help he or she grow up.

One of the most important jobs of parents is to be able to build self esteem in a child. This will allow the person to succeed in the future regardless of the career chosen.

Since children look up to the parents as role models, it is only best to start from the very top. Many of these people have to work for a living to put food on the table. When the topic of work comes around and the children are present, it is always best to think and say something positive so that the children will inherit the same attitude when it comes to school.

In the same manner, when parents help the children with the homework, it is perfectly all right to help do some of it to make the person understand and then let the kid work on the rest. This should be double check later on to ensure the rest of the assignment is correct which will surely pay off when the report card comes in.

Studies have shown that getting a child into sports can also help build self esteem. It wouldn’t hurt to try something new such as soccer or basketball which are team sports that will foster teamwork and camaraderie.

If the child is not doing well compared to the others, perhaps it is time to buy a goal or a mini court and have this installed at home. Playing with the kids and having fun at the same time may be the extra practice that is needed in order for the player to do better in the game.

Not everyone is talented in sports. It is a good thing there are other skills the child can participate in to boost self esteem. There are music lessons using various instruments and art classes using paint, oil or charcoal. The child has to start somewhere and who knows, this could be the person's passion in the future.

There is another way to boost the child's self esteem. This involves doing something that has never been done before while spending some quality time. Father and son can go through a different bike trail in the woods or have mom and daughter bake a few goodies in the kitchen.

There is a chance the group could get lost or the things that come out in the oven are burned. The point is, the child will not know what will happen without trying and part of self confidence is being able to take a risk and becoming a better person no matter what happens in the end.

When this has been developed, this is the time that the child should be allowed to make some choices. Parents should be supportive regardless of the outcome but should always give words of caution and wisdom.

After all, there are risks worth taking and there are others that are not worth it. Knowing the difference between what is right or wrong and being able to understand and weigh the consequences is another important lesson in life.

jscode

2007-11-18T21:42:00.000-08:00

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